rediscovering eden
Who am I, that the Lord of all the earth
Would care to know my name
Would care to feel my hurt
Who am I, that the bright and morning Star
Would choose to light the way
For my ever wandering heart
Not because of who I am
But because of what You've done
Not because of what I've done
But because of who You are
I am a flower quickly fading
Here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean
A vapor in the wind
Still You hear me when I'm calling
Lord, You catch me when I'm falling
And You've told me who I am
I am Yours, I am Yours
Who Am I, that the eyes that see my sin
Would look on me with love
and watch me rise again
Who Am I, that the voice that calmed the sea
Would call out through the rain
And calm the storm in me
whom shall i fear
whom shall i fear
i am yours
who am i
Hi! I'm
Sharley but everyone calls me... well, i guess i have too many nicknames to list, opps:X
I'm
14 going on 15 this year and to all those darlings out there, remember my presents on
29 Aug! XD
Currently studying in
RGS, class
303 and a proud
richardsonion.
I
swim because I'm too cool for a sport that requires clothes. i
dance because I'm so hot I melt.
dailies
Saturday, December 20, 2008
-11:17 PM
It just suddenly hit me when i was showering. It was like some bus drove into me, that sudden impact which left me feeling pained and breathless. I just started crying in the shower, but no sound came out... Woah, the experience was like damn creepy! It's like one moment you are just showering, and the next second you are experiencing tremendous pain which is indescribable and you are crying soundlessly. Creepy right? I have been experiencing this quite often this year. Don't know what's wrong with me. Ohoh, and i had a blackout just an hour ago! I was just getting up from the sofa, then everything turned black and the next moment *BANG*, i hit the floor. There seems to be some problem with my body... Anyways, just feeling blue today, cause yesterday i received the best girl award and it got me thinking. With my current condition, I'm not able to train, and seeing other people working so hard to improve, it makes me feel so bad until i felt that i didn't deserve that award at all. That feeling made my heart ache. It made me think that I'm not working hard enough, that it's all my fault for getting sick, that i should just stop swimming completely, yadayadayada. All those negative thoughts just kept swimming around in my mind, making me feel so inferior. I'm trying already, but it's just not enough. And no matter how hard i try, all my efforts just come to nought. It just hurts to think that no matter how much effort you put in, you still don't get to see your desired results, and that you keep trying and trying and trying, but you are still not good enough. It makes me wonder, why do i even bother trying? So that my ego gets hurt? So that people can look down on me? Laugh at me heartlessly? What do i get from trying hard? All my efforts just comes up to nothing, nothing at all. Well, looking at all my trophies and medals didn't help to boost my ego, it left me feeling worst. It's sad to think that you can never win any more trophies or medals. Reality bites! *Ouch*Gotta go take my medicine now, toodles~*Labels: *~Dreaming~*
